A ponderous question...

The ponderous question being; what drives people to do the nasty things they do?

I have been thinking about the answer to this question a lot lately.
Possible answers being:

-> Jealousy?
-> Spite?
-> Unhappiness?
Or,
-> Just plain mean at heart?

From recent experience, I'd like to answer with all of the above.

I have to say, I do not understand why people act like this. Are they that unsatisfied with their own lives that they need to bring others down with them? Maybe I'm just naive, I don't know... But from where I'm standing (or sitting, as the case may be), isn't it better to be happy for others when things go well in their lives? To congratulate them on their achievements and celebrate with them instead of feeling jealous and hard done by? Because, if you think about it, if you're envious of those who are meant to be your friends, shouldn't you take stock and reflect on your own life and ask yourself why you're jealous? Maybe you need to change some things that aren't working for you anymore.

Now, having said that, I am not claiming to have never been jealous of a friend. Because I'm sure we all have to some extent. It's how you use that envy that matters. Do you turn into the green-eyed monster and refuse to be happy? Or do you process it as a healthy, human emotion and move on from it making the conscious decision to rise above it and be happy for the other person?

I choose the latter option.

As for spite, unhappiness and just plain mean at heart, I personally try to see the best in people no matter how horrible they can be because is it really possible that there are black-hearted, nasty people out there that cannot be nice? Up until recently my answer would have been no. But unfortunately I have come across people who don't seem to have any 'nice' in them. This revelation makes me quite sad. Not just in myself, but sad for these people. Sad that they are living like this, with a perpetual black cloud above their heads determined to make everyone else as miserable as them. It also begs the question, "Why are they like this?". Is it a case of upbringing or environment? Or maybe just the simple fact that they believe the world owes them something?

I don't think I will ever find the answers to these questions, not unless I get a degree in psychology anyway...


Xxxx