Hey people...
I can't even remember the last time I posted something up here... But, suffice to say, a lot has happened in whatever stretch of time it has been.
I got married and separated in the space of 14 months. Owned three motorbikes and had seven pet rats. Changed jobs twice, with a third on the horizon. Met the love of my life and realized what true love really is. Dyed my hair pink and re-discovered friendships that had fallen by the way-side. And learned what the meaning of crazy truly is.
So, you could say it has been an eventful space of time.
Leaving my marriage made me very aware of what people can truly be like. People say that they love and care about you, but when push comes to shove, they show their true colours. I realized that people can turn on you without uttering a word. Without even considering the other side of the coin, only that one face that they have been shown.
But, it can be the same with the people that you expect to be supportive. They can surprise you by inserting their opinions and judgements when all you need is unwavering support, no matter what decisions you have made. Then, on the other hand, you can also discover that the people you don't see as much as you should can be the most supportive of all.
Hindsight is a wonderful thing. If only hindsight was available to us in the moments that we need it. The moments that we need that clarity to see what is right in front of us, to ensure that we are making the right decisions and won't end up with numerous moments of regret in the future. But then, that wouldn't be hindsight I guess...
Thanks to the wonders of hindsight I realized that I didn't actually fit into the world I had inserted myself in. It didn't make me feel good. I thought it made me feel good when I was in it and oblivious. But, in reality, I didn't fit. And when it comes down to it, when it comes to the big scheme of things, that is absolutely fine by me. I have a new world now that I fit into perfectly, and I can appreciate that fully now because I have been where I don't belong and know how it feels.
I have spent a lot of time reflecting on the last three years. Wishing I had been more observant and picked up on the more subtle things going on in my surroundings and in my interactions with others. Wishing I had done things differently, or known things then that I know now.
But on a positive note, I have realized how life can really be. It is now filled with love, laughter and fun. Excitement for the future and more happiness than I have had for a long time.
'Till next time guys!
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